Counseling Southern Style

Grumps and Bubba are quietly sitting in a boat fishing, chewing tobacco and drinking beer when suddenly Bubba says, "I think I'm gonna divorce my wife - she ain't spoke to me in over 2 months."

Grumps spits, sips his beer and says, "Better think it over - - - - women like that are hard to find.”

One thing I have always loved, and that is fishing. Bass fishing, Crappie (Ain't March a wonderful month) fishing and late night summers waiting on a big cat to strike can be some of the best times a person can have.

One thing I've noticed while being out on the lakes. Not many women fish. The lake is full of guys and their 20K dollar boats, but very few times do I ever see a woman on the lake. When I do, it is usually with their hubby/bf, and they are not always enthused.

Now before you go saying anything, yes, there are women fisherpersons (p. c. term i think). But you are outnumbered.

So it is not unusual for two guys to be sitting in a boat and chatting about what is happening in their lives.

So my question to you is: How can guys sit together and talk about things that are on their minds, yet they won't take the time to even say more than a hello to their wives? Somehow their buddy becomes a sounding board for them, although what they are saying is probably sounding bored to them.

Guys, take the time to talk to your spouse. And women, even if you're not that interested in their hobbies, try to have some. Ask how their trip was. What did they catch (although you probably won't know what they are talking about, or the great importance thereof).

If you start talking now, hopefully you'll avoid having to talk to a pastor or counselor later, when it may be too late and too much damage done.

Silence is not always golden. Sometimes it is the most cruelest thing on this planet. Break the silence now, you'll be thankful later.

Thank you and have a God blessed day.

Do your Ministries know how to Minister?

From a Previous Blog:

Make sure that the church ministries are doing something to minister to the congregation and community. Is this a time when the men or women meet, eat, and gab about the latest news? Or do you have speakers who can come in and motivate, educate and get something going or furthering a goal of the group? Have the ladies start a quilting/sewing club that meets, and can also listen to the heartbeat of the community when they come to join in the group. Men, start a group that gathers regularly and goes hunting or fishing or some other popular sport in the area. Invite non-church members who love the sport to join in. Have a “wild life” supper near the end of the hunting seasons to celebrate the time and the catch that was shared together.

Every church and every community is going to be different. Different areas of the country will have different needs and likes/dislikes. If you’re by a seaside community, you will likely have more tourists in your area than a small town in the middle of the state with no particular place of interest near it. Make sure that your ministries match the needs of the community.

Some towns have a higher number of unemployed and/or homeless people living there. These places need to have shelters, especially when weather conditions are going to be bad. You do not have to have a shelter full time either. During hurricanes along the coast, blizzard conditions in the mountains, or excessive heat in the flatlands, open your social/fellowship hall to meet the needs. Provide ice water and a cool place to come in and relax for a while during the heatwave. This will also give you a chance to sit and talk to people and find out what their needs are, and if you can help them. Turn up the heat and have your congregation bring blankets for people to curl up on and get out of the cold for the night. Give the homeless a shelter during a hurricane so that they do not lose their lives due to falling trees, power lines or other weather conditions.

If you have a large number of motels or b&b’s around you, consider putting up flyers about your service, and let people know that they are welcome in your church, even if they do not have “Sunday Clothes” with them to wear. Jesus didn’t require people in His presence to go get dressed up before He would teach/preach to them. So why should we? Offer donuts/pastries and tea/coffee before service. The vacationers may have missed the continental breakfast at the place that they were staying, and this would give them a reason to come check you out.

Yes, they won’t be there to be an active part of your ministry on a regular basis. But what if they either do not attend a church, or they attend one where they are not being taught. This could be your chance to make a difference. Plus, many people like to explore and check out a community before they move there. This could be a way of getting them pre-interested in your church for when they return to live there in your community.

There are many other ideas, but these are a few to get you thinking about how you can minister to the community and the church members around you. Think about what you have for your surroundings, and build a ministry that will match the interests. Needs will be met, and hopefully people will become closer to God in the process.