Making Toilet Paper from Poop

Churches keep repeating the same ole' thing, thinking that their way of doing it will be more productive. But you can't make toilet paper from poop, no matter what method you try.

Ewwwww......   Yuck ............  Well ....... If the commode fits, sit on it!

Anyway, my personal opinion here:

I believe the reason churches are not actually growing (hey, stealing other members from nearby churches doesn't count as growth) is because they are too focused on how to draw people in to the church.

Bad joo-joo.

We need to be able to figure out how to draw people out of the church.

WOAH! Are you nuts? Yep, (ca-shew) (bless you), and my psychiatrist agrees.

No one wants to do anything more than just sit in a pew/chair for an hour. Churches just want people to fill the pews/chairs for an hour. Anything over that costs more in overhead because of utilities.

Please ... give me a break .....

How about let's start to see what it would take to meet the needs of people outside of the church? What are the residents of your community needing? What can you do to make their lives more enjoyable? What can you do to meet needs in your area?

Remember, Jesus went into more houses where the rest of the world didn't want to be, than where all of his followers thought he ought to be!

Try taking care of those things, and then people will come in the doors. And guess what?

WHAT?
They'll stay. People remember who was there in the bad times. They'll stick around even in the good times. And chances are, they will be willing to work towards making someone elses lives a little bit better too.

My Testimony

I was raised in church all of my life. My family attended church so many times in one week, that if the Janitor left the door open while he/she was cleaning, we sat in the pews and watched. (well, not really, but you get the idea! LOL)
I believed that you went to church because that was what you were supposed to do. The other days my family read the bible and had devotionals each morning with breakfast.
I learned about all of the people in the bible, and all of the things that happened long ago. I would sit there saying to myself, "Well, that's nice." I looked at it the same way as I looked at learning history in school. I was sure I would need to know it at some point, and if not, it was possible useful trivia for down the road.
NO ONE explained that the events could still happen today. NO ONE explained that I could put to use in my daily life the lessons learned. Salvation was just that. Being saved from burning in Hell for eternity. Once saved, I just needed to attend church and act my part, and everything would be fine.
WRONG!

What started out as being a way of life for me became how I didn’t want to live my life. I started working in the cotton mill when I was 16, cleaning the air units for the different floors, and turning pic clocks on Sundays. Mom insisted that I take the job, and after I found out that I would be working on Sunday mornings, I didn’t argue. Finally, a break from having to listen to the same things I had been taught all my life. Or had I? If I had been taught, then wouldn’t I have a better understanding of what Christianity meant? Some would say yes. I probably would agree, especially now that I have thought more closely about it.

For 2 years I enjoyed having at least one service that I didn’t have to attend. Besides, Sunday nights were usually more casual, and I didn’t have to dress up to go then. Nevertheless, I was still expected to attend every service when I wasn’t working. I lived with my mom and grandparents, and as long as I lived under their roof, that would be the way that it was.

I couldn’t wait to escape to the next level: not having to attend at all.

When I was a senior in high school, the pastor talked me into taking a day off from work near graduation, and participating in “Youth Day” at the church. The youth of the church would take over all of the responsibilities for a Sunday, and usually a senior would be the one to deliver the sermon. Guess who was picked? 3 Guesses and the first 4 don’t count!

After the service, the preacher walked up to me and said, “You’ve found your calling. You’ll make a fine preacher one day.”

“Oh my gosh, get me outta here,” was all I could think. Church people … Jesus Freaks … Stuff Shirt Preachers … HELP!

I graduated from High School, and turned down a scholarship and went in the Army. I wanted to be as far away from home as I could be. I succeeded. West Germany would be my home for the next 2 years. I was happy, with very little complaints.

I moved up in rank as I became eligible, but I was injured while on maneuvers, and so I was discharged on an Honorable, Service Connected Disability discharge.

The back injury brought a lot of pain, but it posed no problem, as I knew how to deal with the pain. Alcohol was cheap; Drugs were easily obtained while I was in service. When I got out, I found out that the same was true in civilian life. People who sat beside me in church were the same ones sitting beside me now that I was back home getting drunk, stoned or a raucous combination. And we wonder why the “outside” people view us as hypocrite’s?

I came home, traveled around the states for a while, and then settled down on one spot. However, my life was not settled. A beer put me to sleep, and a beer woke me up so that I could go to work. Or school. Yep, I had signed up for college, using my service benefits. I figured that it might not hurt to find another line of work that paid better (security pays minimum), plus at a college there was always a chance of meeting some hot chick and hopefully getting laid at least on the weekends.

I think God has a sense of humor. I met a girl. Not a specifically hot chick. But a girl. We had a lot in common, except that she had been married twice, and I hadn’t made it to the altar once. She had two wonderful daughters, who would later become my stepchildren.

Anyway, I should have had a warning on our first date. Well, 2^nd date. First one was to take everyone to McD’s. We won’t count that one. Second one went like this. Picked her up, we dropped the 2 girls off at her mom’s house to babysit, announcing that we’re going out to eat and then go bowling. (Bowling has always been in my blood, and it always will!

A great time was had by both of us, and we arrived back at her mom’s house at 9:30 that evening. As we were walking up to the door, her mom met us, bible in hand. I thought to myself, “Oh crap, this can not be good.”

After having railed on us for 10 minutes, I finally found a way to exit, and exit stage “I’m Outta Here” is exactly what I did. If I were smart, I would have kept running. However, I didn’t.

We wound up getting married a year later, and our mom’s kept harping on us that we needed to get in church. “The children need to be brought up in church.”

Been there. Done that. We both had.

Finally we gave in. I didn’t want to go back to my old church. (didn’t want those little bitties to run their mouth about me walking in to their sanctimonious place. Another story, another day.)

Therefore, I agreed to go to my wife’s old church. I had only been to a Baptist church. The order of worship was the way that I thought it was supposed to be. WRONG.

‘Assembly of God’ is what it said on the sign out front. I silently wondered to myself if God ever assembled in this or any church. But I was determined to find out.

Hmmmmm… just what I expected. Stuff shirts. Haughty Taughty women with enough makeup to paint the Sistine Chapel painting by Michelangelo again. Nothing new here.

“Okay, just sit and be quiet for an hour. Make everyone happy. I can do this.”

When I climbed back onto the pew from the floor beneath it, I wondered if I would ever escape from the “Hotel Didn’t I Warn Ya” that I had found myself in.

Have you ever seen the video by Ray Stevens “The Mississippi Squirrel Revival” that was popular a long time ago? Women are shouting, hands are raised in the air (along with other items) and a general commotion has struck the congregation of this poor little church.

Well, this church wasn’t little. People were shouting, hands were raised in the air (along with some other items that I won’t mention here) and I was sure that there was a squirrel somewhere nearby. And to top it off, I don’t think he spoke any English, because they were all hollering in some language that I had never heard of before.

So I sat back down among all of the hulla-balub and watched for the squirrel to pass by. My grandfather had taught me to love to eat wild squirrels, and if no one else was going to help themselves to him, I figured I would.

Hmph, it seems that there was no squirrel. Things sure were squirrelly all right. Mom-in-law was turning red and bouncing up and down, Wifey looked like she was a deer in the headlights of an oncoming car, and the girls were cringing and eyes darting, looking for a route of escape. Of the 3 options, I had just about decided that the last one was my recourse too. However, it settled down, and the preacher got up and started preaching. He kept thanking and welcoming the “Holy Ghost.” I kept looking around, trying to figure out how Halloween had got here so fast. I thought that Easter was still a few weeks away.

Holy Ghost. Wait a minute. We used to sing something about the Holy Ghost. Oh yeah, I remember now. Okay, I guess this is just a different version of our Holy Ghost song, “Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost.” All right, back to listening to the message. Yada, Yada, Yada. Same poop, different church. Finally, we get to leave.

“Run Forrest Run” is what would have been in my head if the Gump movie had been out then. Instead, something intrigued me. At least these people didn’t sit stone faced for an hour. All of that jumping and hollering surely meant that someone was going to get hurt (and I hoped it wasn’t me), but at least it made it interesting to watch.

So from time to time, especially on holidays (don’t you know, it is mandatory in the south to show up at church on Easter and Christmas, whether you really wanted to or not… at least the wife can show off all of the new clothes that she picked out for her family.)

So, our Check In/Check Out was pretty easy, except for the time that Daylight Savings Time started and we arrived at the service for Easter as it was ending. Embarrassing.

My life had changed somewhat. I didn’t party as much anymore. I still drank on the weekends, although not until I had gone to church and come back home on Sundays. Now that I was sober most of the time, I started wanting more. Our mom’s never quit harping on us to attend church, and finally, a radio show convinced me that maybe I should.

“Welcome to the Sound of Light, with Brett Dillard” came a voice on my radio as I scanned through the channels. Taking college courses at a rate of 18 cu each semester left little time for a regular job, so I started delivering pizzas for a national chain. My Pontiac T-1000 (another version of Chevy’s Chevette) was a basic car, and contained only an AM/FM radio. Rock 101, WCKN, Your Classic Rock Station was playing some music from the 60’s that I didn’t want to listen to. So I hit the “seek” button on the Radio, and this is what came out of the speakers in just a few pushes. Rock music started blaring, so I settled in to listen to their tunes. He said the first band was called “Petra.” Some pretty kick-butt music, so I continued to listen. Ten minutes later, Brett cuts in and mentions Jesus. Oh man, you had to go and ruin some good music. (I discovered later that if I had been listening to the words, and not just head banging to the music, I probably would have realized what “light” that this “sound” was directed at.)

Quick, try 101 again. Crap, same stupid music. Okay, music was still rocking on the new station, “I’ll just ignore the words and turn it back to the other station.” I left it there the whole evening, listening to it as I rode around town trying to make bucks from stoned guys who had the munchies, and drunks who knew they shouldn’t be anywhere near a steering wheel or a stove.

The next Saturday, 7 o’clock in the evening, I turned the radio back over to that station. I had tried it out earlier that week, but the music put me to sleep. Bam-a-lamma Ding-Dong. There was that jamming music again. These guys could really rock the house. Of course, there were a few chick songs that tried to make people teary-eyed. Thank goodness, they seemed to occur that night when I was either knocking on someone’s door, or in the shop setting up my next run.

I repeated this several weekends, and then they announced that one of the groups that they played on the radio was going to be at a local church. And not just any church. An Assembly of God church. Hmmmm… okay, I know how they operate. If they are cool enough to have this group come perform, I want to check this church out. The concert was not for a few months, but I went ahead and started attending anyway. Wow, this church seemed different. The pastor seemed different. The music seemed different. Granted, there was still a lot of wailing and gnashing of teeth, and a few people flopping on the floors like almost dead fish, but I decided I could overlook that. Little did I know that the enemy is often on the home front.

Sometimes you lose. Sometimes you quit trying. Sometimes you quit trying to lose. Maybe that was what I was doing. Trying to lose. I certainly wasn’t trying to win. My wife was not supportive of my actions with me going to church. She didn’t do church, and she couldn’t understand why I wanted to. Especially at another AOG church, of all things.

We only had one car for quite some time, and she would have it to drive to work. I drove the work truck home (I worked for Allied Van Lines at the time) when I could, but I couldn’t go parking a moving van in the church parking lot. That would have probably put too many people over the edge.

Several times people would give me a ride home while I was walking, and even offer to come pick me up. But my schedule was hectic, especially on Wednesday’s, and I never knew from one week to the next if I would be home or not.

Eventually the weather turned bad, and I found too many excuses to go. I still listened to the radio show every Saturday night. I counted myself as a good person. I wasn’t out raping, killing or stealing from anyone. Sure, I indulged in the ‘spirits’ occasionally, especially Crown Royal or Bacardi. But I wasn’t a drunk anymore. I could remember what happened before and after I started drinking now. So I couldn’t be a bad person. RIGHT?!? NOT!

I still wasn’t really saved. I had bought the fire insurance when I was 8 years old. But that was still all it was to me. Fire Insurance.

Then we moved back to the home county where I grew up. Walked in a Baptist church, and this is no lie, a lady recognized me, grabbed her kid, and said, “Don’t go anywhere near that man. He’s trouble.”

I never went back. If that woman ever reads this, be glad that I came to my senses; otherwise, you would have a rough day at the throne down the road.

My girls had started listening to the music too, and they wanted to get active in church. We found a church, and they had an awesome drummer. We quickly became friends and started up a Christian Rock Band. (Heads up, I still wasn’t living that life that I sang about). For 2 years we had a blast. I eventually became the choir director for the church. Then tragedy struck.

(1)        Stroke

(2)        Multiple Sclerosis

Wheelchair bound. The pastor came to see me a couple of times. But no one else ever did. It wasn’t long before I never heard from him again. See there. Just what I thought. Christians only care about you when you’re in a position to help them. “To serve God.”

Still in a wheelchair, I started playing for another group, and before long, I was out of the wheelchair and now found myself serving as choir director at another local church. Methodist Denomination.

But after surviving much gnashing and wailing, this was a change. In addition, I fell in love (platonically/spiritually!) with the pastor. She helped me to see that Christianity was so much more. I even started to understand some of the words that they had been playing and talking on the radio, and how the bible could apply to my life.

Several different churches later, I wound up serving in another Methodist church. This time I found out about a program called, “Lay Speaking.”

Nope, it doesn’t mean to recline while you’re preaching, although I think I may try that sometime and see what the church reaction is. It means that ordinary people could be trained to help in different areas of the church and its worship services. I went to the “Basic” class out of curiosity, and I was hooked. I bought every “line” and weighed every “sinker.”

One thing led to another, and I wound up in Seminary, and eventually to my own church. Methodist, in case you were wondering. A small country church. I had learned a lot while serving in the ministry, but being a pastor was quite a revelation.

People can be cruel, weird, supportive and just down right strange. I’ve had people call me or stop me before I left church and tell me that they really got something from my message. They also told me how appreciative they were that I had given them something that they could apply in their daily lives.

I’ve had people call me to the side and bless me out. “How dare you talk about me like that? I didn’t think my wife would go through with her threat to tell you what I did!” (I’m scratching my head trying to figure out what they are talking about. Evidently, they were caught with their hand in the cookie jar.) I just preached what I felt was laid on my heart, and I said what needed to be said. Truth was, most of the women told me nothing, and supplied me with lots of treats and goodies to eat when I came to visit.

Have you ever noticed that people come to church to socialize? I’ve had people tell me that I needed to bust up someone’s “clic,” while theirs was truthfully causing more harm than the aforementioned one. However, since it was their clic that was okay. Everyone wants to meet all of the other “important” people who attend, desperately hoping to gain their favor and “get ahead” in life. Somehow, no one ever shows up expecting to meet the one person who matters the most! ME! No…. just kidding….

Do you know whom I’m talking about? Whom do you go to church to meet? The lawyer who you heard is hiring, and your son is about to graduate and hopefully will give him a job when he passes the bar? The contractor who has broad shoulders, tanned lines, and a chest you could sink your face into. The girl from the grocery store. You know, the one who always wears low cut tops, and when she bends over to bag your groceries, her “ample wares” are displayed for your viewing pleasure?

WRONG ANSWER!

GOD…. 3 Letters… Count them G  O  D. He is always there, waiting on us to come and worship Him. Not just sing “I Love You Lord” in a praise song and go back home and exclaim GD the first five minutes that you’re in the house.

Worship God, the one who can deliver you from the load that has you tilted at a 45-degree angle. 

Come back Wednesday for Part Two: Where I'm At Now

God Ain't Never Had a Grandchild

GOD AIN’T NEVER HAD A GRANDCHILD

John 1:12-13

12      But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name;

13      Who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.

I helped with Vacation Bible School last night at my church here in Easley. I had the boys from 1st to 5th grade. Now, these guys still have a lot of energy, and they can be a bit much to keep up with. (ever tried running after 7 kids who are over 40 years younger than you?)

One of the kids was the pastors son. The lesson is very basic, and I could tell probably boring to him. He is very bright, and astute in his learning of the bible. SO it set me to thinking.

How many of us have ever gotten something because of our family heritage? Maybe you got into a better school because it was your parent’s alma mater. Maybe you got a job because a parent was in a position of influence in your community. Maybe you’re working hard in your career so that your family name can be kept in a higher regards. In our world that we live in, it is possible to get ahead because of our family, especially our parents.

But let me tell you about a time when it isn’t going to help you to have a politician for a dad, a Sunday school teacher for a mom, or a preacher for a close relative.

There is going to be a man at a desk, with a very large book in front of Him, and in that book are going to be a bunch of names. Your loved ones who have passed on before you may or may not be in that book. One by one people are going to step up to the desk, and then He will look in the book to see if He has their name anywhere in the list. If He finds it, He will say “well done my good and faithful servant, you may enter into Heaven”. If He doesn’t find it, He will tell you “Depart from me, for I never knew you”. No ones name will be listed in a sub category under someone else’s name. Each name will have to stand there by itself.

This He I’m talking about is Jesus, and He has the final word. You can’t ask Him to look under anyone’s name, or explain who you are kin to. He won’t accept it. As a matter of a fact, there is no excuse that He will accept.

That is why it says in verse 13 that you must be born of God, not flesh or blood, like your kinfolk. So today I am asking you, are you born of God? Have you accepted Jesus as your Savior, and asked him into your heart? I pray that you have. If not, contact me and let me talk more with you about it.

God bless and Have a Great Day!

(13) High notes on the organ set dogs in the parking lot to howling.

(13) High notes on the organ set dogs in the parking lot to howling.

Luke 19: 37-40

³⁷ When he (Jesus) came near the place where the road goes down the Mount of Olives, the whole crowd of disciples began joyfully to praise God in loud voices for all the miracles they had seen:

 ³⁸ “Blessed is the king who comes in the name of the Lord!”^[b]

   “Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!”

 ³⁹ Some of the Pharisees in the crowd said to Jesus, “Teacher, rebuke your disciples!”

   ⁴⁰ “I tell you,” he replied, “if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out.”

I remember when “pet rocks” were the latest trend. Everyone had to have one. Some painted them, put clothes on them, hung signs around them and too many other crazy things to mention. The one thing that I liked about the rock as a pet was it didn’t poop or pee on the floor. It never barked incessantly while I was watching TV or talking on the phone. If it had “cried out,” it probably would have been my poop that needed to be cleaned up.

The Psalms reveals that all God's creation have contact with God (Psalm 93). All God's creatures praise Him (Psalm 145:10). It is only mankind who needs forgiving and saving and teaching as to how to worship (Psalm 36 & 51), the animal kingdom worships God continually and naturally.

"Praise Him, hills and mountains, fruit trees and forests; all animals, tame and wild, reptiles and birds." Psalm 148:9, 10.

So I ask you, next time the dogs start to howl outside the church doors, are you going to let them do the worshipping for you? I have talked in previous blogs about our role in worship. Let’s start worshipping now, before the dogs start to drown us out and our voices of praise aren’t heard at all.

(11) There is a special fund-raiser for a new septic tank.

(11) There is a special fund-raiser for a new septic tank.

In many churches I think the septic tank has stopped up, for you’ll never find more poop (figuratively) in some septic tanks than what is floating about the congregation. But I’m not going to dwell on that subject for the moment.

Instead I want to talk about why the church is having a need for a special fund-raiser for a new septic system.

Too many times we live day to day on what we receive for an income. We make no effort to save anything for “a rainy day.” We choose to spend too much on too many things that we don’t have to have. Many people will argue that they have to have the many things. After going through a divorce, I had to redirect my finances, so I cut out a lot of things. I ate out less. I turned the cable tv off. I went back to “dial-up” for my internet – ¼ of the price of broadband and it taught me patience. We are a society of “I want it now!” and that has hurt us in many ways. Why don’t we want God with that much urgency? If only we did.

Two other problems arise from the above situation.

(1) Tithing is not an option. It is required. You say you don’t make much money. Then 10 percent won’t be a big sum to give! Sit at home for one weekend a month and spend time with the family watching TV, movies, playing board games. A family of four can spend $100 easily on a night of dining out and movies in the US. If you find yourself indulging in this more than once a month, consider giving it up and giving that $100 to the church. If you already tithe, this is your “offering.”

(2) Churches get in an “I’m scared to spend money” situation, especially in a tough economy. Finance committees worry about the money coming in from tithing to pay expenses, let alone repairs. So if they do have any extra, they won’t spend it. I agree that some should be kept back for emergencies, but if you truly trust God, don’t hoard years of expenses away in the bank. Be reasonable. God gave you all of that excess that you refuse to let go of now, don’t you think He can give you that much and even more when you need it again. Be smart, don’t be stupid with His money. Trust in God to provide what you need now, use what He has already given you, and make sure that you aren’t asking God for something while you aren’t giving to Him either.

(7) There’s dried tobacco juice down both sides of the church van.

(7) There’s dried tobacco juice down both sides of the church van.

One thing my wife hates is a dirty car. And one thing I hate is to have to clean them. I’m not messy, but sometimes things get dirty even though it wasn’t intentional. I will tell myself that I’m going to go clean it up when I get home, and I forget when I get there. Or it will rain for a few days. The dirt and grime from the road will splash up on the car, and I will say that I’m going to wash it on the next pretty day. Then they will forecast rain again in a few days, so I will decide to wait until after that has passed. Vicious cycle. Needless to say, it never gets washed, because it usually rains every few days here.

But thank goodness there is never any tobacco juice stains on the outside either. There may be some bird poop, and it may be a little runny if the bird’s tummy wasn’t doing too well that day, but no tobacco juice.

I eventually feel bad about my wife having to ride in a dirty car, and I’ll either wash it myself or give in and spend the money to have someone else do it. To answer your next question, yes, I do have pride in what I own and drive. It’s paid for finally, and that is enough right there to make me happy. So I will say today that I will start to be more diligent about keeping my cars clean from now on. (okay wifey, you can stop applauding now!)

The church van however is another story. People perceive how we are by what they see us doing, and how we take care of ourselves and our belongings. So if any church property is suffering because of our misuse (leave the tobacco at home next time) or failure to maintain it, then who can we blame when the world looks down on us?

If we can’t get off of our rears and take care of our stuff, at least start taking care of God’s stuff. Yes, that is His house. And his van, car, bus or whatever is used by the church. You want God to bless you? Start by taking care of what He has given us to use, but in worship/ministry and at home. Then when He sees you taking care of what you already have, He might be prompted to give you more to take care of. But just like an irresponsible child, if they can’t take care of what they already have, why should we as adults give them anything else to tear up?

Let’s start caring about what we have around us, both at home, work and at church. Volunteer your time and help to get things done. Physical limitations? Give an offering (above what you tithe) to pay someone to do it. Just get it done! Then we won’t be the brunt of jokes or have people misperceive us and our intentions.

(6) A singing group is known as "The O.K. Chorale."

(6) A singing group is known as "The O.K. Chorale."

Hey, I think I know this group. Not many of them have musical talent, and their voices are a little bit “hickeyfied” (ask, and ye shall receive an explanation) so the music comes out close to what it is supposed to be, but people wince at the wrong notes and sit and listen because they are not going to get up there and be a part of that either.

When they are done, the audience may clap (for whatever reason, maybe not wanting to hurt their feelings), and the singers will sit in their seats feeling that they are the best!

Folks, it’s time we do something about this. Now I don’t mean for you to walk up to them and say, “Your singing sucks!” No, instead of being hurtful, you need to find out what other areas of the ministry that they actually have talents that could be helpful and steer them in that direction. Too many times in churches we do not use people where needed for fear of hurting someone’s feelings. People sit on committees or perform tasks that are not really in their true capability. But because that is what they want to do, that is what we let them do.

And because of it, that ministry suffers. The cleanliness of the church is not up to a reasonable standard. The music of the church feels stunted or not enjoyable. The church lawn has more waves in the grass than at a sports stadium.

Ministers, it’s time to “clean house.” Start with a clean slate. No one goes back into a position unless you can show where they are qualified to do such. Use their performance and the results from it if they do not have professional qualifications. If they are not qualified for the role that they used to fill, find out where they can serve, or give them a “retirement party.” (see earlier blog in “how to have a successful church” series).

Announce that the music program is going to have auditions if you have a large enough congregation. Or start a worship team of your singers that can carry a tune and use them, especially for special music, and the choir for when everyone else is singing so that they won’t stick out.  These are just a few of the suggestions that I can give you. Each situation is different and calls for its own course of action. But start to think outside of the box. Pastors, you wouldn’t put unqualified people in a business, hoping to be successful. So why do you expect success in your church when the wrong people are in the wrong positions? Church is not a business, but many of the same basic principles need to be exchanged between the two. Then the furtherance of His Kingdom can become a reality.

(3) Opening day of deer hunting season is recognized as ...

(3) Opening day of deer hunting season is recognized as an

official church holiday.

Having served in a church for years, I’ve noticed that there are occasions where I can always tell that the crowd is going to be thin for that Sunday. Some of them I didn’t mind too much. Fathers Day and Mothers Day, it seemed like a lot of the younger crowd was gone to spend time with their parents, hopefully at church worshipping together first, then maybe a meal and time spent talking after that.

Super Bowl Sunday was another one. The crowd would start to thin for the morning service (they had to stay home and clean/prep the house/food), and then the evening service would only be the “Die Hard’s” that never had an interest in sports or a reason not to come to church. I often times considered having a Big Screen TV put on the pulpit, and then I would preach during commercials and half time. But then they would be more interested in the commercials than the sermon probably.

The mentality of “wanting a reason not to have to come to church” is one that I can understand. (read the beginning blogs if you haven’t already.) People do not understand the reason to come to church. And when we get them there, they don’t understand what they are supposed to do while they are in church. Is it no wonder that people don’t want to come to church? People don’t like being where they feel “lost” or “left out” and they are unsure of why they are even there, except maybe that they are to be there because that is how it has always been done.

We know that as Christians we have to change. As a church we have to change. If what we’re doing isn’t working now, shouldn’t we want something that is? If you are a church leader, start today to educate the congregation and those around you as to the real meaning of Christianity and how the church needs to become Christian again. Then the whole world can see Christians as being united, and all of the same mind and accord. Then as Christians we can make a difference in the world today.

Starting Over

On a recent trip I met someone who I hit it off with immediately. We were talking about churches and he mentioned about starting a church, and some of the local denominations. His next sentence caught my ears. “Why not start over? It has to be better than what we have now.”

Wow, what a statement. Starting over. That tells us a lot about how denominations are perceived. And also one other thing. Long established churches. It is not uncommon to wind up with a lot of clic’s and groups that can quickly make anyone start to feel like an outsider if they are new. I addressed this in a previous blog, so I won’t go into this again.

But I do want to address the idea of starting over. Starting over in many ways can be a path to a better life.

Christianity. When you accept Jesus as your Savior, you start a new life (hopefully), leaving behind the things that caused you to stumble in your life. Some people try to pin down exactly what actions are a sin. The bible is explicit on a few, but in a world that is rapidly changing, the list can grow quite quickly. So here is the simplest way to decide if you are in doubt.

(1) If you do something that makes other people look at you as a non-believer

(2) If you say something that makes other people look at you as a non-believer

(3) If you do something that makes you feel guilty

(4) If you do or say something that makes you wonder if it is right or wrong

Well, then it’s wrong.

Problem comes in what a lot of people do next, they listen to the words of an old popular song:

“If it feels good, do it.”

You cannot always substitute the “feel good” into the above to determine if it is the right thing to do. The only checkpoint for that is the bible. There are so many things that tell you what to do and how to do in the bible.

What? You don’t know what those are? Read the bible.

“But it’s too hard. I don’t understand it.” This day and age you can find all kinds of versions of the bible. Some versions stray from the original content, but the King James Version, New King James Version, and the New International Version are the ones who track the closest to the original document.

“But Keith, you just listed the King James as a version.” Yes, it is a translation, so it is a version. It is not the original document. Unless you are fluent in Greek and Hebrew, the documents that we have from that age would be “greek” to you. (haha, I couldn’t resist!). I personally prefer the NIV translation. The writers have gone back to the original document and they have tried to keep the translation current to the meaning of the language of today.

Find a version that you can read and start reading. Some of the items that are mentioned are hard to understand, especially in the Old Testament. My suggestion is to start with the New Testament and read one of the gospels. Matthew, Mark, Luke and John are the first four books that start off the New Testament. Pick one and read it, then skip to Acts and read until you get to Revelations. Stop. Go back to the Old Testament and read it carefully. If you don’t understand a term, go to Wikipedia.org or go to www.biblegateway.com and look it up. These two sites are free, and they have a ton of resources for you to read. I use both of them for my biblical studies. Plus, if you cannot afford a bible or another translation of a bible, biblegateway has many different translations for you to read. Then go back and read the rest of the gospels, and finally Revelations. Revelations can be a tricky book to read and grasp. I highly recommend a study series by Dr. David Jeremiah, “Escape The Coming Night”, which will help you understand Revelations, as well as apply it to modern times. I have attended several of his seminars, and listened to him on the radio, and he is “spot on” with his teachings and preaching.

So start over in your life.

Start over by reading the bible.

“But I’ve read it already.” Well, I don’t doubt you, but did you absorb anything that you read? Read it this time, even a chapter at a time, and then ask God to reveal to you what He wants you to learn from it.

Start over by being a “new you.”

Be someone that even you wouldn’t recognize. When you get to church and the same group gathers to start their gossip. Stand up and tell them they shouldn’t. If they still continue, walk away. Leave the room. Make a statement by doing so that you won’t be a part that does not fit with the Christian lifestyle.

Start worshipping while in church. (I’ve covered quite a bit about this in previous blogs)

Quit checking out who is doing what in the sanctuary. Shut your eyes and start your private prayer time. Start by asking God to work in your life. Ask God to help you clear your mind of everything else that is going on around you, and start praying for yourself, your family, your friends, the people who are currently in your church, the people who can’t be in your church, and the people who should be in your church.

Start to be a new employee/manager/owner

If you’re employed, go to work and be different. No gossiping. No backbiting. Start by telling someone thank you when they help, help someone when they need it, and start to be someone that others come up to you wanting to know what is different about you. PERFECT opportunity to be a witness for God in this situation.

If you do wind up in a place where you can’t be the Christian that you’re supposed to be, find a place where you can. Not all churches are Christian, though the name or denomination on the sign might indicate differently. If they need another book in addition to the bible, nope, not a Christian group. Resources that help you to understand what the bible is telling you are wonderful. But if someone wants you to study something instead of the bible, RUN FORREST RUN! Not all employers welcome a Christian environment. Employers are not allowed to discriminate on the basis of religion. Just be the example, and pray for God to change their hearts.

Start to be the spouse/(g)(b)friend that you need to be. If your “significant other” isn’t a Christian, rethink your relationship.

2 Corinthians 6:14 (NIV) says, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”

I’ll go more into this in a later blog series where I tackle relationships.

Be the “S O” that you need to be. Show them that you love them. Kiss them, hold their hands, do special things that cause you to have to go out of the way for them. Guys, hold the doors for the girls. And guys and girls, initiate bible study together. Have devotional time. There are plenty of resources for different types of devotions, based on what you enjoying doing and reading.

Start over in your mind. Quit being negative. God is not negative. Start to believe in what you pray for, and in what you do in your daily life so that others can be reached for Christ.

In other words, START OVER!

What are you doing here?

This past weekend we were in Virginia and planned ahead of time to go to an Easter Sunrise Service. When we got to the place where the service was being held, a lot of the people looked at us strange. Like, “why are you here?” Even though we were supposed to be worshipping with other Christians on a special Holy holiday, they made us still feel like outsiders. Only 2 people actually spoke to us. Neither one of them was the pastor of a local church that was holding the service. May God bless those two.

Sometimes we wonder why our churches don’t grow. People visit, and no matter how they might be dressed, or you may not recognize them from the surrounding area, do you look at them like, “what are you doing here?”

Do you take any time to go up to them and introduce yourself and acknowledge them, or do you simply wonder why they never come to another service? I can tell you why!

When people make you feel like that, you have no reason to go back to the church. Your church gets labeled as being full of hypocrites because you are not friendly, it doesn’t matter if you are shy or scared to approach new people. It’s how you are perceived.

People wander into a bar, and chances are someone will start up a conversation. The bartender will ask them what they want to drink. And usually someone who is seated at the bar near where they are standing will start up a conversation.

So if partiers and drinkers can be friendly, and the church is unfriendly, why do you think the bars are full and the churches are empty?

People do not come to church anymore out of habit or respect to God. Most of them could care less about God. And why should they? When they go to church, all they will see is people standing and fidgeting during singing and prayers, acting like they are bored to death. Then some people even start to nod off during the sermon.

Bars have dancing. Bars have music. People will ask you to dance with them. Sometimes they may even get you to sing at a bar, especially if there is karaoke. So why go somewhere once a week where the atmosphere is different? Bland, boring, and anyone can tell that everyone in the place (and sometimes the pastor/priest) would rather be somewhere else.

We have got to get back to worship. We have got to include people in our worship. You see that someone is obviously struggling with something, and is sitting all alone. Get your rear end off of the seat and go sit by them, or stand by them if that is the case. Take their hand and hold it. Put your arm around their shoulder, and let them lean on you and cry if they need to. START PRAYING FOR THAT PERSON!!! It doesn’t matter what their trouble is. It doesn’t matter if they NEVER TELL YOU what their trouble is. Start praying. Ask for the Holy Spirit to come and give them peace. Beg God’s mercy upon them and whatever situation is going on in their lives. PRAY FOR THAT PERSON! THEIR FAMILY! THEIR JOB! THEIR HOME! COVER ALL OF THE BASES!

BE AN EXAMPLE!   Let other people see what you are doing, and they will know that this is a church that cares, and hopefully they will come to know that you serve a God that cares. Don’t wait for later. Do it then. It won’t be disruptive if they are silently weeping on your shoulder while you lift up silent prayers to Jesus.

If you see someone sitting by theirselves, go sit with them. It doesn't matter if they are there for the first time or the one-thousandth time. Go let them know that someone cares! God cares! And I would hope that you do too!

Just before Jesus was captured by the Romans and crucified, He was in the garden praying to His Father. He had asked the disciples to pray with him, but they fell asleep, maybe even figuring that He could handle it on His own.

Are we going to be like the disciples? Are we going to leave someone alone to bear the burden and anguish that they are going through, or are about to go through?

Let’s stand up and stand with our fellow brethren. Let’s start to be available to our brothers and sisters and anyone else who is around us. The world is hurting bad enough without Christians adding any more hurt to anyone else, especially in our churches.

Welcome to the Sound of Light (otherwise known as "Turn on Your Radio")

“Welcome to the Sound of Light, with Brett Dillard,” came a voice on my radio as I scanned through the channels. Taking college courses at a rate of 18 cu each semester left little time for a regular job, so I started delivering pizzas for a national chain. My Pontiac T-1000 (another version of Chevy’s Chevette) was a basic car, and contained only an AM/FM radio. Rock 101, WCKN, Your Classic Rock Station was playing some music from the 60’s that I didn’t want to listen to. So I hit the “seek” button on the Radio, and this is what came out of the speakers in just a few pushes. Rock music started blaring, so I settled in to listen to their tunes. He said the first band was called “Petra”. Some pretty kick-butt music, so I continued to listen. Ten minutes later, Brett cuts in and mentions Jesus. Oh man, you had to go and ruin some good music. (I discovered later that if I had been listening to the words, and not just head banging to the music, I probably would have realized what “light” that this “sound” was directed at.)

Quick, try 101 again. Crap, same stupid music. Okay, music was rocking on the new channel, I’ll just ignore the words and turn it back to the other station. I left it there the whole evening, listening to it as I rode around town trying to make bucks from stoned guys who had the munchies, and drunks who knew they shouldn’t be anywhere near a stove.

The next Saturday, 7 o’clock in the evening, I turned the radio back over to that station. I had tried it out earlier that week, but the music put me to sleep. Bam-a-lamma Ding-Dong. There was that jamming music again. These guys could really rock the house. Of course, there were a few chick songs that tried to make people teary-eyed. Thank goodness they seemed to occur that night when I was either knocking on someone’s door, or in the shop setting up my next run.

I repeated this several weekends, and then they announced that one of the groups that they played on the radio was going to be at a local church. And not just any church. An Assembly of God church. Hmmmm… okay, I know how they operate. If they are cool enough to have this group come perform, I want to check this church out. The concert was not for a few months, but I went ahead and started attending anyway. Wow, this church seemed different. The pastor seemed different. The music seemed different. Granted, there was still a lot of wailing and gnashing of teeth, and a few people flopping on the floors like almost dead fish, but I decided I could overlook that. Little did I know that the enemy is often on the homefront.

(next segment … It’s hard to win the war when you keep losing so many battles)

Welcome to the "Hotel Didn't I Warn Ya"

Came home, travelled around the states for awhile, then settled down on one spot. But my life was not settled. A beer put me to sleep, and a beer woke me up so that I could go to work. Or school. Yep, I had signed up for college, using my service benefits. I figured that it might not hurt to find another line of work that paid better (security pays minimum), plus at a college there was always a chance of meeting some hot chick and hopefully getting laid at least on the weekends.

I think God has a sense of humor. I met a girl. Not a specifically hot chick. But a girl. We had a lot in common, except that she had been married twice, and I hadn’t made it to the altar once. She had two wonderful daughters, who would later become my step children.

Anyway, I should have had a warning on our first date. Well, 2^nd date. First one was to take everyone to McD’s. We won’t count that one. Second one went like this. Picked her up, we dropped the 2 girls off at her mom’s house to babysit, announcing that we’re going out to eat and then go bowling. (Bowling has always been in my blood, and it always will!)

A great time was had by both of us, and we arrived back at her mom’s house at 9:30 that evening. As we were walking up to the door, her mom met us, bible in hand. I thought to myself, “Oh crap, this can not be good.”

After having railed on us for 10 minutes, I finally found a way to exit, and exit stage “I’m Outta Here” is exactly what I did. If I was smart, I would have kept running. But, I didn’t.

We wound up getting married a year later, and our mom’s kept harping on us that we needed to get in church. “The children need to be brought up in church.”

Been there. Done that. We both had.

Finally we gave in. I didn’t want to go back to my old church. (didn’t want those little bitties to run their mouth about me walking in to their sanctimonious place. Another blog, another day.)

So, I agreed to go to her old church. I had only been to a Baptist church. The order of worship was the way that I thought it was supposed to be. WRONG.

‘Assembly of God’ is what it said on the sign out front. I silently wondered to myself if God ever assembled in this or any church. But I was determined to find out.

Hmmmmm… just what I expected. Stuff shirts. Haughty Taughty women with enough makeup to paint the Sistine Chapel painting by Michelangelo again. Nothing new here.

“Okay, just sit and be quiet for an hour. Make everyone happy. I can do this.”

When I climbed back onto the pew from the floor beneath it, I wondered if I would ever escape from the “Hotel Didn’t I Warn Ya” that I had found myself in.

(next episode… Check In/Check Out)

The Sleeping Giant Gets a Wake Up Call

What started out as being a way of life for me became how I didn’t want to live my life. I started working in the cotton mill when I was 16, cleaning the air units for the different floors, and turning pic clocks on Sundays. Mom insisted that I take the job, and after I found out that I would be working on Sunday mornings, I didn’t argue. Finally, a break from having to listen to the same things I had been taught all my life. Or had I? If I had been taught, then wouldn’t I have a better understanding of what Christianity meant? Some would say yes. I probably would agree, especially now that I have thought more closely about it.

For 2 years I enjoyed having at least one service that I didn’t have to attend. Besides, Sunday nights were usually more casual, and I didn’t have to dress up to go then. But I was still expected to attend every service when I wasn’t working. I lived with my mom and grandparents, and as long as I lived under their roof, so be it.

I couldn’t wait to escape to the next level; Not having to attend at all.

When I was a senior in high school, the pastor talked me into taking a day off from work near graduation, and participating in “Youth Day” at the church. The youth of the church would take over all of the responsibilities for a Sunday, and usually a Senior would be the one to deliver the sermon. Guess who was picked? 3 Guesses and the first 4 don’t count!

After the service, the preacher walked up to me and said, “You’ve found your calling. You’ll make a fine preacher one day.”

“Oh my gosh, get me outta here,” was all I could think. Church people … Jesus Freaks … Stuff Shirt Preachers … HELP!

I graduated from High School, and turned down a scholarship and went in the Army. I wanted to be as far away from home as I could be. I succeeded. West Germany would be my home for the next 2 years. I was happy, with very little complaints.

I moved up in rank as I became eligible, but I was injured while on maneuvers, and so I was discharged on an Honorable, Service Connected Disability discharge.

The back injury brought a lot of pain, but it posed no problem, as I knew how to deal with the pain. Alcohol was cheap, Drugs were easily obtained while I was in service. When I got out, I found out that the same was true in civilian life. People who sat beside me in church were the same ones sitting beside me now that I was back home getting drunk, stoned or a raucous combination. And we wonder why the “outside” people view us as hypocrite’s?

(Next segment: Not only is my view of Christianity getting turned upside down, but I’m now dizzy from it spinning!)

What is Upside Down Christianity?

Upside Down Christianity ... What exactly is meant by that?
It means to turn Christianity on its head and shake out all of the bad things that have latched on to the faith. We wonder why most churches don't grow, and if they do, it is usually from "stealing" other members from other churches to theirs. Start a youth group. Hire a band. Serve some pizza. The kids fill up the place. Have no substance. Band gets old. Pizza gets old. Soon the only people at the church are old. The young ones are gone in search of the newest trend in the newest church.
FOR STARTERS:
It's time to turn everything upside down and shake out the misconceptions of what makes a church grow.
How do you measure church growth? By the number of people on Sunday mornings in the pews? It certainly isn't the number of rear ends in the chairs on Wednesday night. Have we forgotten that we need to turn back to what really matters. Having a relationship with Jesus. Quit selling Fire Insurance and start showing people how to have a Higher Assurance!
I was raised in church all of my life. My family attended church so many times in a week that if the Janitor left the door open while he/she was cleaning, we sat in the pews and watched. (well, not really, but you get the idea! LOL)
I believed that you went to church because that was what you were supposed to do. The other days we read the bible and had devotionals each morning with breakfast.
I learned about all of the people in the bible, and all of the things that happened. I would sit there, saying to myself, "Well, that's nice." I looked at it the same way as I looked at learning history in school. I was sure I would need to know it at some point, and if not, it was possible useful trivia for down the road.
NO ONE explained that the events could still happen today. NO ONE explained that I could put to use in my daily life the lessons learned. Salvation was just that. Being saved from burning in Hell for eternity. Once saved, I just needed to attend church and act my part, and everything would be fine.
WRONG! (Stay tuned for my wakeup call)